I didn’t think I’d actually ever have to write about this. Sure, I’ve had two other breakups before but I thought that with Tyler that was it. Fast forward 7 years and things are a lot different then where I thought they’d be way back when. I thought it might be helpful (and therapeutic for me..) to give you guys my tips for surviving a breakup.
- Don’t be afraid to cry: or to yell, or to scream. Let every emotion out. Keeping it bottled up inside isn’t going to make anything better. It doesn’t make you seem stronger, especially if on the inside you’re slowly dying. Breakups are hard. No one expects you to be a heartless bitch and have no feelings about it. Let it out!
- Have a great support system: this is crucial. Like I said in tip #1 you don’t need to keep it all in. Talk to someone whether it’s your mom, your best friend, or your brother. My entire family plus my friends are what kept me sane through this entire ordeal. I’m not one to talk about a lot of stuff but they forced me to talk, especially my best friend Megan. Without the love and support from everyone around me I don’t think I would have gotten through everything like I did (and trust me I was still a train wreck).
- Don’t be afraid to get away: even if it’s only a drive around town. Sometimes you just need to escape everything that’s going on and be by yourself. For me I drove, a lot, and I still do. It lets me be alone with my thoughts and jam out to my favorite guilty pleasure songs (Britney Spears anyone??). I also knew I needed to get away for what should have been my wedding weekend. Now this doesn’t apply to everyone but I was in a 7 year relationship and we had planned a wedding almost completely and then broke up 3 months before we were supposed to say “I Do”. I knew I was going to be a mess that weekend because this isn’t what I wanted and I wanted to be wearing the white dress and dancing the night away with my new husband. So Megan and I packed up the car and headed to Rhode Island. We didn’t do anything special but getting out of this house and this town and this state and away from all my family who were looking forward to the wedding as much as me was something that made the weekend a little more tolerable.
- Talk to your ex: as weird as it may sound. Hear me out on this one…Tyler and I were together for 7 years. For 7 years he was my best friend, my go to for everything. He knows everything about me, has seen me at my absolute best and seen me at the lowest points of my life. He is still my best friend. It took some time for us to get to a friendship point after the breakup because I was (and still am..) heartbroken over everything. He was my first true love and nothing will ever change that, I’m always going to love him. We’re now a little over 4 months broken up and I can honestly say I talk to him pretty much every day. We went to a hockey game the other night, we’ve gone and gotten dinner and caught up. It’s making it easier knowing that I haven’t lost him completely. Not saying that this will work for everyone, but our breakup wasn’t on terrible terms. We both want to remain best friends and I’m going to try my hardest to have that happen.
So there’s four tips on how to survive a breakup. They might not apply to everyone because every breakup is different but these are what are helping me get through it. Like I said, he’s my best friend and the love of my life and this has been the worst possible life experience I could ever imagine for myself. Breakups suck ass but remember that you will get through it in time and that you’re not alone.